jokerRight now I’m having trouble on how to go about this anecdote of mine.  I’m reminded of dear Danielprayerful’s advise of issuing an R-18 Rating/warning for our young readers not because of subtle insinuations but more so because of some profanity in this story.  Well, just take it in stride my friends, life is short as it is (smile).

– William

It was a hectic day at office and to pass by Makati to check on a project feasibility study was not doing me any good.  I glanced at my wristwatch reading “4:05 pm”.  Just enough time I thought to reach the Cubao church service at 7:00 pm. I arrived at Makati Ave around 4:30 then was about to cross the street when a dog and a cat caught my eye patiently waiting at the other side.  After a few seconds the traffic aide motioned us to cross.  My eyes were on the dog and his loyal companion.  Both crossed the street tails wagging in unison running towards a private high-walled home. The cat climbed a tree nearby and jumped across the wall while the dog continuously attempted to push open the gate.  After a while someone did open the gates – most probably a yaya who shouted in a southern accent “labas-labas kasi, pasuk!” I couldn’t help but smile on my way to the branch office.

After my pakay I left the office and climbed into my car – the clock read 5:05 pm.  Two hours margin before the pagsamba.  More than enough I smiled.  Or so I thought.  It took me forty-five minutes from Ayala to Guadalupe, then another forty-five to Santolan.  “Kung malasin ka naman!,” I uttered inside my car. “Wala na, hindi ako aabot,” I said over and over to my invisible passenger beside me.  And suddenly I realized lokal ng Murphy was just around the corner.  Some years back I was a deacon there and Ka Dan Orosa our pastor – a very charismatic minister if I may say so.  He even had a pet monkey named “Cory.” I’ll never forget that.

Anyway, I made a right turn at Santolan and a left to the chapel.  I arrived a few minutes early and like most of us waited for the aisle to fill up exactly shy of one person para tamang-tama tapat ka sa bentilador (smile).  While seated my gaze sweeped the hall for familiar faces.  Some had grown old, some new faces, I didn’t recognize the PD though.  A new guy I guess.  Then suddenly I noticed the deacon in front of me – a very close pal of mine (buddy-buddy) a police officer assigned at Crame. He didn’t notice me because I was seated behind him. I didn’t tap or call his attention because I had something else in mind.

(Now comes the part you should never do during a pagsamba.)

After the hymn singing and the opening prayer, the texto began.  After around twenty minutes into the sermon I slowly reached out and took the supot ng abuloy of my friend deacon and hid it behind my back. Another ten minutes and my friend turned to check his supot.  Siyempre wala, tingin sa kanan, sa kaliwa, tapos sa ibaba baka nga naman nahulog.  He was really nervous and restless now.  Matatapos na ang texto, kasunod na ang abuluyan wala supot niya.  I just sat there quiet like a nice little boy. Pagtingin niya sa likod he saw me and his face red with controlled rage sternly blurted, “Akin na!” I answered in a poker face, “Ano?, wala,” then the presiding minister advised the congregation to stand up for the closing prayer.  We all stood up to pray.

CPL asian laughing IS10309448_0After the prayer, I slowly handed over the supot.  His face was now flaring red as he snatched the supot from my hand.  I sat down trying desperately to control myself.  I couldn’t look up but when I managed somehow to look at him, he started to lumikom staring at me with his blood-shot eyes and rather in a conspicuous voice uttered “PU****INA MO!” while walking down the aisle.  Mga kapatid na nakakita sa pangyayari wala rin magawa kung di tumawa ng tumawang nakayuko.

tumblr_nuxqa3mZ6f1t5kiyvo1_1280Like I said, this was a spur of the moment thing.  Sorry again best friend for having made you curse habang tumutupad ka (masyado ka kasi seriyoso bro).  Anyway rest assured there will be no repeat.  Cross my heart and hope for the Sanggunian to die.

– William

04-06-10-linkedin-status-update      Social media is restless on the alleged loan of P2,000,000,000.00 (billion) and its connection to the Philippine Arena by Maligaya Development Corporation. Plus the supposed forgery of the Deed of Sale (property of Ka Lottie) to favor  the INC.  Here are some photocopies of the docs –

12065791_162946337384655_8666682285175816956_nbaank loan